PREFACE
Evidently, every nation is filled with millions of broken marriages. Various individuals, organizations and governments have not yet found a solution to the problem, for it is not carnal, but a spiritual matter.
Divorced couples are turned in large numbers almost on daily basis. Parents of divorcees are helpless. Some couples that have marriage problems, who would like to divorce, but are religious, do not have the courage to divorce their partner to avoid public ridicule and mockery in their various religious groups.
In my assessment, over sixty per cent married couples are living with wrong partners. Some people may think that I am wrong in my assessment, probably because their marriage are blessed with children. However, I have to remind you that having children alone is not enough evidence of a successful marriage. After all, criminals, drunkards and mad people do also have children. Even harlots in hotels also do.
This particular topic is therefore published out of experience and inspiration from God, whom am I serve, to guide spinsters and bachelors who will eventually get married. It will help them to know how they will prayerfully know and choose their life partner to the glory of God. They say knowledge is power.
Part one
WHAT PEOPLE THINK AND DO
The taught which always fills the heart of any reasonable bachelor or spinster for ages has been: Who is that man or woman that will be my real life partner?
The important of such a thought cannot be over-emphasized. However, the scriptures have this to say;
There is a way which seemed right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death. (Proverbs 14:12)
Non-Christians or unbelievers have many systems of selecting their partners. These have been going on from generation to generation, in line with customs of various people. Different communities adopt many methods to match couples.
One system that is common to many traditional societies is that, usually when a young man is fully grown up and ready for marriage, information would go to all relations and friends to be on lookout for a suitable wife for the young man. Based on this, plan would be made, and everyone would be expected to play a part. Many visits would be made to the home of prospective of such brides in order to spot the preferred lady. Sisters of the young man would be examining their girlfriends to select the ideal for their brother.
Parents would highly concerned about the family background, health and physical strength of their prospective daughter-in-law and how useful she would be to them in domestic work. The young man himself would be in lookout for a beautiful girl, preferable one with skills that would enable her contribute to the welfare of the family. In recent times, some young men attach much importance to beauty in selecting a wife, so that they would be envy of others while out on social occasions.
Sometimes, still in very traditional societies, the parents of the young will conclude every arrangement about their son’s marriagewithout involvement the young man. Perhaps such anecdote would help to illustrate the system.
A certain young man living in the city was one the sent a girl to be his wife by his parents. On enquiry, he discovered that every arrangement concerning the wedding had been concluded by his parents, including payment of the bride price, without his knowledge! The young man concerned had been known from his childhood for being obedient to his parents. So, when he demanded to know why he should enter into such unplanned marriage, his parents said that marrying the girl for him is an opportunity they could not miss! According to them, many parents are struggling to marry the girl for their son. They also observed to the young man that the girl is not only beautiful, but also hardworking. Since the young man was mindful not to offend his parents, and seeing that to reverse the situation would be very difficult to him, so he settled down with the girl sent to him as his wife.
The above instance is what marriage outside Christianity tends to look like.Any shortcut could be taken in the worldly system of marriage. Sometimes marriage is negotiated as if human beings were commodities. Indeed, some prospective bride or bridegrooms are described as hot cakes.
On the hand, some parents who have grown up girls are usually out to see that husbands come early enough for their daughters. They adopt many methods to entice eligible husbands for their daughters. They also do everything to get their relations to join them in their family campaign for husbands for their daughters.
The same in which parents of the young men are eager to see that their sons get married, is the way that the parents of the young women are eager to see that their daughters get married to their own husbands.
Some traditional parents boast openly about the period of time in which they must see grandchildren from their sons and daughters, as if realizing this were in their hands. They forget that unless God approves human plans, they could never materialize.
Therefore, I sincerely advise people, most especially the adults, to mind their utterances, for most boastful words often result in serious embarrassment. They also indicate lack of knowledge of God.
On my next post "Guide on choosing a life partner (part two)" I will explain there.....................
No comments:
Post a Comment